mi-ra-cu-lous

Friday, 10 April 2009

Ching Ming basically means 2 different dynasty back in ancient China in Chinese, and in modern words it means something like "tomb-sweeping-day" or whatever for Chinese to erm..."send their regards" to their ancestors, ROFL. Lets check this out, mira's guide to wipe your ancestor's ass:

Step 1: Clean the home of ancestors

Of course, home means the tomb. Either you clean the grasses so that the tomb looks cool, or if you're rich and you believe in Feng Shui you can actually dig out your ancestors and rebury them at some sort of Feng Shui place, reconstruct a handsome tomb. If you need advice, you can contact Mrs. Lilian Too, in case you don't know who is she, this auntie is a famous Singaporean Feng Shui master.


Step 2: Pay your fees

People don't clean the tomb every month or so, so there will be some "authority" who will do this job for them at a fixed rate (I guess). Apparently some bastards out there refuse to pay, and I hope the "authority" got pissed and slam their ancestors tombs with giant hammer. You can save money and also the Earth by turning off your lights and air-con, please do not be stingy on this.

Step 3: Feed your ancestors



Chinese bring all sorts of food for their ancestors, of course you don't expect their spirit appear out of no where and eat lar. Normally steamed whole chicken and roasted pork is their main course and maybe josstick as appetizer? LOL.


From what I know some people bring the food home to eat after their ancestors finish "eating". Some said that the food won't have any taste anymore, to be honest I don't believe this shit, I think they are just trying to freak the kids out so that they can have all of the food, who knows.

Step 4: Give pocket money


You think only you need money meh? Come on, your ancestor need to spend oso lar! Chinese believe that by burning "money" and "gold", or even paper made maid, cars, laptops, houses, their ancestors will receive the actual thing at the afterlife world. Hundred millions of "hell currency" only cost you like few dollars, so don't be stingy, treat your ancestors well, they might repay you with toto first prize numbers!

Basically this is all people do during the big day. But as everywhere is getting crowded people tend to do those troublesome stuff earlier, later or not at all. Ching Ming kinda reminds me about life and death. Have you ever wonder what you want after you die? Maybe I will curse "Oi you burn me laptop for what here hellmyx broadband so fucking slow, no use!".

This Ching Ming I really hope to pray Mr. Laughing from Hong Kong. This guy doesn't really exist in real life but his death in the Hong Kong drama E.U is a boom! If you din't watch the drama, you probably would also know this guy already, because he's everywhere on facebook. Rest in Peace, Laughing 哥.


Anyway I think my tombstone should look really cool so that everyone come also laugh and happy, haha, something like this.


Ciao.